Saturday, 1 December 2012

How To Fix A Marriage With 3 Vital Sign

How To Fix A Marriage
When we talk about the state of a marriage, we tend to compare it to the human body. If things are going well for a marriage, we call it "healthy". However, if it's going through a rough phase, we think of it as "sick".

To keep your marriage healthy for the long run, it's essential to be aware of the telltale "vital signs". This way, you'll know if all is well or if your relationship needs some work.


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But what are these indicators exactly? Here are some things to look out for:


Vital Sign #1: Dealing With Difficulty

What does this mean?

We all know that conflicts are part of married life. What a lot of couples forget is that the way they handle sticky issues greatly affects their relationship.


What Should I Look Out For?

In particular, there are a couple of key habits that can aggravate disagreements. First of all, assuming that most of your marital issues are caused by your partner's shortcomings (i.e. "He only cares about himself", "She's too possessive") leads to a habit of assigning blame and putting labels.

As the philosopher Kierkegaard once said, "Once you label me you negate me."

Labeling a partner makes you ignore their positive qualities and limit who they are according to the label assigned to them. So if a partner is branded as a "selfish pig" or "control freak", they'll never be anything more than that.

What's more, this mindset distracts couples from the reality that their marriage problems are a SHARED responsibility. Eventually, this perception will cause them to see each other in a negative light and feed a mutual bitterness.

On the other end of the spectrum, there's also the habit of using the silent treatment on a partner during an argument. Instead of peppering the other person with critical remarks or blaming them, some people mistakenly think that they can keep things from escalating with their deafening silence.

The truth is quite the opposite - it makes the other person feel ignored and unimportant. Instead of diffusing the situation, not communicating at all could just fuel the anger even more.


Why Is This Vital To My Marriage?

These destructive approaches to handling conflicts don't attack the core issues of a marriage. Because of these habits, a couple's actual problems end up unresolved.

At the end of the day, the level of hostility remains the same - if not higher than before.



Vital Sign #2: Seeing Each Other Through Rose-Colored Glasses

What does this mean?

If a couple is fixated on each other's faults (as explained in the first vital sign), a good way to deal with this is by creating a more positive atmosphere instead.


What Should I Look Out For?

If you feel like calling it quits every time you have an argument with your partner, chances are there aren't
enough positive emotions in the marriage to fall back on.

So, you should consider if you and your spouse can do the following:

  • Can you easily point out what you like about your spouse?
  • Are you able to express your appreciation of these positive traits to each other?


John and Susan, a couple from California who have been married for more than 30 years, shares their thoughts on this. "We've never been good at avoiding arguments, but I think we've stayed together all this time because we've always focused on our endearing traits," Susan says.

John adds, "Yeah, I mean we probably get on each other's nerves just as much as everyone else. It's just that she likes to point out what she likes about me in little ways - so I sort of like returning the favor."

Why Is This Vital To My Marriage?

All couples have their share of fights and disagreements, so it's only natural for negative feelings to accumulate over time. That's why a marriage can stay healthy if the people involved can keep these feelings down to manageable levels and replace them with positive ones instead.


Vital Sign # 3: Staying In Touch

What does this mean?

When you first met your spouse, chances are you knew everything about each other. You probably spent hours and hours talking about your childhood dreams, favorite bands or pet peeves.

During the romantic phase of a relationship, people love learning every intimate detail about their partner. It's all part of the excitement of discovering someone new.

After the "reality check" stage of marriage kicks in however, there's a tendency for a lot of couples to become complacent when it comes to knowing each other. The things you know about your partner are likely to change over the years.

So the question is: have you kept up with these changes?


What Should I Look Out For?

First of all, think of all the things you would like your spouse to know about you. For example, do they know that you're anxious at work because of an upcoming promotion that you're aiming for? Does your partner know that your favorite place to relax is that beach resort you both discovered five years ago?

Now ask yourself if you're aware of these similar details about your spouse. Do you know about the things that annoy, scare or excite your partner? If you've forgotten these things somewhere down the road, don't fret - you can always ask your partner about it.

Not only would it make for a great conversation, it's a great way to reconnect with your spouse.


Why Is This Vital To My Marriage?

The level of knowledge you have about each other's individual lives is a good health indicator of your marriage. Being aware of the things that matter to your partner is a powerful way to stay emotionally connected - this is especially vital in times of crisis.

Having this intimate connection will keep you from drifting apart when things get tough. Think of it as a backup power supply when your relationship is running on empty. Being consistently updated with each other's lives is something you can both count on when life's unpredictability hits you.

All in all, having a strong marriage means being aware of the factors that make it healthy in the first place.

Keeping yourself informed of these things helps you zero in on the areas that need improvement. Above all, a proactive approach keeps your relationship as a fit as a horse for years to come.

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13 comments:

  1. These types of posts should be publicize the maximum to help the couples going through miserable condition of their relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I agree with the third vital sign. Keeping in touch and having an open communication is really important to couples. Problems can get really tiresome, physically and emotionally. And talking about all of it can help release all the stress. You might not see the effect early, but in the long run, you will see that it can help little by little.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I want to share this testimony of a spell caster that help me get my husband back to me. My name is Rhoda i lived in U S A and i have 4 kids, before i was having problems with my husband which make him hate us so much that even lead to break up and leave us to another woman, until a friend of mine directed me to this man called Dr. stanly, i contacted him for love spell immediately, then he help me get my husband back in peas and we are now happy family am very much thankful to Dr. stanly that help me,so i must tell the people how good he is. I will advice you to contact him via this email drstanlyspelltemple@gmail.com. Then your problem will be solve.

    ReplyDelete
  4. OMG,i think am the most happiest woman on earth cause my dream has come to past, with the help Dr okpa who made it possible for me, i was in love with Martino for 3 years we were living happily and in love, so a friend of mine came from Canada to visit me,so after the visit she went back, then i never knew she was having affair with my love,and during this period i was pregnant for him, he no longer cares for me and never come back home ontime, not knowing that my friend never went back to Canada she was in a hotel were my lover do go and see her every evening, i was in pain cause he never cares about me any more then i told another friend of mine how my love is now acting,so she told me not to worry that she will try and figure out were my love do goes every time after work, so their was a day this my friend called me and told me that she is at a hotel now that i should come and that was how i went and i saw him with Luanda my friend that came to visit me all the way from Canada, when i saw this i fainted,and the most surprised part was that my love did not see it as anything instead he shouted and that was how he never came back home he never called me again and he sent me money and a letter saying that i should go and terminate the pregnancy, that was the last message i heard from him, but i did not do so i gave birth to the child and luckily he was a boy,so i have been trying to get him back to my life for years till i came in contact with this great man name dr okpa who help me, he told me that the lady casted a spell on him, and that i have nothing to worry about that my love will come back to me within 24hours, i was like hmmmm, ok let me watch and see, surprisingly my love hat have not called me for years called me and was pleading and begging me to forgive him that he never knew what came over him, that he will be coming tomorrow to come and see me that he will never ever do anything that will hurt me again in the rest of his life, i was surprised and short of words tears of joy feel from my eyes, and the next day he came and was still pleading and he saw his son he cried, and that was how we lived together and now we are happily married and he bought me a new car and now we have moved to a better apartment were we are living happily together. all thanks to dr okpa for helping me and bringing back happiness into my life, if you want to thank Dr okpa you can contact him via okpatempleofsolution@gmail.com or cell number +2348056563186 Roseline from United state of America.re we are living happily together. all thanks to dr okpa for helping me and bringing back happiness into my life, if you want to thank Dr okpa you can contact him via okpatempleofsolution@gmail.com or cell number +2348056563186 Roseline from United state of America.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hello people on this forum or website , am just an over exerting person today for what this great man call DR ABULU of abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com has just done in my marital life .and i will like you on this forum to help me in thanking he because for the past two years my husband Micheal has been cheating on me with a Russian lady and this has couse the family a lot of problems and our baby Evonne where the one perpetual taking the pain because at this time my husband don't normally come home to ask after the child or care to provide what the child needed so with all this problems i was not happy in my marriage and i started going for different kind of marriage cancelling and looking for solution every where not until this faithful day when i was browsing on the internet i saw a testimony shared by miss Michell from Australia about this DR ABULU of abuluspiritualtemple@yahoo.com and i as-lo contacted he for help and that was how he gave me some instructions and and i followed what ever he told me and i was surprise when he said to me go my child for all will be fine in 24 hours .and within the 24 hours i actually received a call from my husband who has not called me for some months now asking after the child and i . and that was how was the end of my marriage problems . so this is why i promise to testify to the whole world about this man DR ABULU and if any is also depress with such problems contact he and you will also find success his website, http://abuluspiritualtemple.webs.com
    bye
    NORA

    ReplyDelete
  6. i just want to share my experience and testimony here.. i was married for 4 years to my husband and all of a sudden, another woman came into the picture.. he started hailing me and he was abusive..but i still loved him with all my heart and wanted him at all cost…then he filed for divorce..my whole life was turning apart and i didn't know what to do..he moved out of the house and abandoned the kids.. so someone told me about trying spiritual means to get my husband back and introduced me to a spell caster…so i decided to try it reluctantly..although i didn't believe in all those things… then when he did the special prayers and spell, after 2days, my husband came back and was pleading..he had realized his mistakes..i just couldn't believe it.. anyways we are back together now and we are happy..in case anyone needs this man, his email address olotospellhome@yahoo.com his spells is for a better life. again his email is olotospellhome@yahoo.com

    ReplyDelete
  7. After being in relationship with Wilson for seven years,he broke up with me, I did everything possible to bring him back but all was in vain, I wanted him back so much because of the love I have for him, I begged him with everything, I made promises but he refused. I explained my problem to someone online and she suggested that I should contact a spell caster that could help me cast a spell to bring him back but I am the type that don't believed in spell, I had no choice than to try it, I meant a spell caster called EZE MALAKA and I email him, and he told me there was no problem that everything will be okay before three days, that my ex will return to me before three days, he cast the spell and surprisingly in the second day, it was around 4pm. My ex called me, I was so surprised, I answered the call and all he said was that he was so sorry for everything that happened, that he wanted me to return to him, that he loves me so much. I was so happy and went to him, that was how we started living together happily again. Since then, I have made promise that anybody I know that have a relationship problem, I would be of help to such person by referring him or her to the only real and powerful spell caster who helped me with my own problem and who is different from all the fake ones out there. Anybody could need the help of the spell caster, his email: extremewhitelovespell@yahoo.com you can email him if you need his assistance in your relationship or anything. CAN NEVER STOP TALKING ABOUT YOU SIR HIS WEBSITE ADDRESS is http://extremewhitelovespell.webs.com CONTACT HIM NOW FOR SOLUTION TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS

    ReplyDelete
  8. My name is Rossy from Canada, i was heart broken when my boyfriend of 3years dumped me for another girl, i was really in love with him so i try all my best to get him back to know avail until i contacted Dr. Book for a love spell, he cast a spell for me to get my boyfriend back and after 3 day of the spell my boyfriend came back to me. I will want anybody that is having any love problem to contact him via his email address testimonytempl@gmail.com.

    ReplyDelete
  9. My name is Susanne from Florida. My husband left me for no reason on 24th of February 2012. He moved in with another woman, I felt like killing myself. My life was very bitter and sorrowful. Then one day, a friend of mine told me about a doctor that is very good and does not even charge for his services, I didn't believe it because I've worked with so many of them and it didn't work. so I decided to try this great doctor called DR, Kim. I contacted him and I gave him the necessary information. He didn't ask for anything but he said after the spell works before i can pay for the service, the next two days which was on the 29th of July, 2012 I received a call and it was my darling husband Thomas. He apologized and came back to me. Thank you Dr, Kim. I will forever be grateful to you. You can reach him on his email: fabo.blackmagicspell@yahoo.com , Try him today and thank me later.

    ReplyDelete


  10. My husband is back!!! I had a problem with my husband 2 months ago,which lead to us apart. When he broke up with me,I was no longer myself,I felt so empty inside .Until a friend of mine told me about one of her spells that helped her in same problem too that she found on a television program. i emailed the spell caster and I told him my problem and I did what he asked me. To cut the story short,Before I knew what was happening,not up to 48 hours,my husband gave me a call and he come back to me and told me he was sorry about what has happened, I'm so grateful to this spell caster and i will not stop publishing his name on the internet just for the good work he has done for me.If you need his help,you can email him at (obasispelltemple@gmail.com)or tel +2348071223911 and he will also help you.

    ReplyDelete
  11. COMPLIMENT OF THE SEASON TO ALL AND MAY THIS SEASON BRING JOY AND HAPPINESS UPON YOUR FAMILY AND ALSO BRINGS ABOUT FAMILY REUNION AND RESTORATION IN THIS NEW YEAR 2016......

    My Name is Alan Pratte, From USA. I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr OTIS DARKO has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost Ex WIFE to me with his great spell, I was married to this woman called Sharon we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when I was unable to make her pregnant for me and also give her al she needs she left me and told me she can’t continue anymore then I was now looking for ways to get her back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email: otisdarko60@yahoo.com then you won't believe this when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost WIFE back, and after a month she became pregnant for me because he gave me some herbs to take also and when she went for a test and the result stated that she was pregnant am happy today am a FATHER of a baby girl, thank you once again the great DR OTIS DARKO for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through any of this problems listed below:

    (1) If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3) You want to be promoted in your office.
    (4) You want women/men to run after you.
    (5) If you want a child/PREGNANCY SPELL.
    (6) You want to be rich.
    (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be
    yours forever.
    (8) If you need financial assistance.
    (9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money.
    (10)Stop Divorce
    (11) CURE TO ALL KIND OF SICKNESS/DISEASES HERE
    (12) Winning of lottery
    (13) Cure To Hiv/Aids
    (14) LOTTERY/LOTTO SPELL WINNING
    (15) CURE TO HERPES AND ANY OTHER SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES AT ALL...
    (16) HAVE YOU BEEN SCAMMED BEFORE AND NEEDS TO RECOVER ALL THE DOLLARS/MONEY YOU LOST TO THESE FRAUDSTER ???.. CONTACT OTIS DARKO AS HE HELPED MY FRIEND CALLED LEONARD CAPTAIN FROM USA TO RECOVER BACK THE SUM OF $300,000.00 DOLLARS HE LOST TO SCAMMERS ONLINE

    Email... otisdarko60@yahoo.com...... YOU CAN ALSO ADD HIM UP ON WHATSAPP USING THIS MOBILE NUMBER:+2348077526136

    ReplyDelete
  12. Am writing this article to appreciate the good work of DR OTIS DARKO that helped me recently to bring back my wife that left me for another man for no reason for the past 3 years. After seeing a post of a woman on the internet testifying of how she was helped by DR OTIS DARKO. I also decided to contact him for help because all i wanted was for me to get my wife, happiness and to make sure that my child grows up with his mother. Am happy today that he helped me and i can proudly say that my wife is now with me again and she is now in love with me like never before. Are you in need of any help in your relationship like getting back your man, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, winning of lotteries, herbal cure for sickness or job promotion E.T.C. Viewers reading my post that needs the help of DR OTIS DARKO should contact him now on his E-mail: otisdarko60@yahoo.com...YOU CAN ALSO ADD HIM UP ON WHATSAPP USING THIS MOBILE NUMBER:+2348077526136

    ReplyDelete
  13. COMPLIMENT OF THE SEASON TO ALL AND MAY THIS SEASON BRING JOY AND HAPPINESS UPON YOUR FAMILY AND ALSO BRINGS ABOUT FAMILY REUNION AND RESTORATION IN THIS NEW YEAR 2016......

    My Name is Alan Pratte, From USA. I wish to share my testimonies with the general public about what this man called Dr OTIS DARKO has just done for me , this man has just brought back my lost Ex WIFE to me with his great spell, I was married to this woman called Sharon we were together for a long time and we loved our self’s but when I was unable to make her pregnant for me and also give her al she needs she left me and told me she can’t continue anymore then I was now looking for ways to get her back until a friend of mine told me about this man and gave his contact email: otisdarko60@yahoo.com then you won't believe this when I contacted this man on my problems he prepared this spell cast and bring my lost WIFE back, and after a month she became pregnant for me because he gave me some herbs to take also and when she went for a test and the result stated that she was pregnant am happy today am a FATHER of a baby girl, thank you once again the great DR OTIS DARKO for what you have done for me, if you are out there passing through any of this problems listed below:

    (1) If you want your ex back.
    (2) if you always have bad dreams.
    (3) You want to be promoted in your office.
    (4) You want women/men to run after you.
    (5) If you want a child/PREGNANCY SPELL.
    (6) You want to be rich.
    (7) You want to tie your husband/wife to be
    yours forever.
    (8) If you need financial assistance.
    (9) How you been scammed and you want to recover you lost money.
    (10)Stop Divorce
    (11) CURE TO ALL KIND OF SICKNESS/DISEASES HERE
    (12) Winning of lottery
    (13) Cure To Hiv/Aids
    (14) LOTTERY/LOTTO SPELL WINNING
    (15) CURE TO HERPES AND ANY OTHER SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES AT ALL...
    (16) HAVE YOU BEEN SCAMMED BEFORE AND NEEDS TO RECOVER ALL THE DOLLARS/MONEY YOU LOST TO THESE FRAUDSTER ???.. CONTACT OTIS DARKO AS HE HELPED MY FRIEND CALLED LEONARD CAPTAIN FROM USA TO RECOVER BACK THE SUM OF $300,000.00 DOLLARS HE LOST TO SCAMMERS ONLINE

    Email... otisdarko60@yahoo.com...... YOU CAN ALSO ADD HIM UP ON WHATSAPP USING THIS MOBILE NUMBER:+2348077526136

    ReplyDelete

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